doing the best I know how...

This past Sunday, I attended a beautiful meditation session. It was led by a guy named Keith and it was aimed at sending love and goodness to the earth. Keith is a soul reader, and the words he spoke after the session was a real eye opener for me. It was also obviously a message that I needed to hear, as it has guided me over the past 3 days since then.

Keith lightly berated us for being so very hard on ourselves. We are only human after all and life is never as serious as we tend to make it. Sure we make mistakes (or what we perceive are mistakes, but remember Steve Jobs said you can only ever connect the dots backwards), and there are always precautions to take, but at the end of the day, God (in whatever form you hold her to be for you) sent us out to play, to enjoy and experience life. But we tend to face life almost with the same atmosphere that we face a job: Something that has to be done in order to make certain ends meet.

What we need to realise is that we have not received most of what we believe we should in this life, whether spiritually or physically or financially. In addition to that, we need to open our eyes and perceive that we are our own blockers in this regard. We believe for some reason that we are not good enough, that we don't deserve something(s), that we are stuck in our fate or a test from God etc. We have fallen for the greatest lie of that this world has ever told: That we are not good enough.

Through this lie, we end up blocking ourselves for anything that might come our way, telling ourselves things like "I haven't worked hard enough yet" or "I don't have the finances yet" or "I should be more careful"... You know the story you are telling yourself. Even if you are open minded, you have been fed this story about an angry father figure sitting up somewhere, just waiting for you to do screw it up (irrespective of your religious background, we all have this patriarchal message running subliminally in some form or another in our lives). You believe that every time you fail, it is either a test or a punishment sent from God. In my opinion, this is not so - I know in my bones, in my blood and in the beating of my heart, that this is not true.

For a moment see yourself as a parent, and know that when your children are sent outside to play, they get hurt, they learn, they grow. You don't watch them to see them fail or to punish them when they get it wrong. You watch them to make sure they are ok, to remind them that you are there, to help them up when they fall and to guide them to the best grounds for playing in. You love them all the time, you hug them and hold them close when they return and the next day you send them out again, loving them all the time and hoping they will remember to be strong, yet loving, clever, yet playful. And this, for me, is the earthly plain I was incarnated on, and the God I came from. The crux of it anyway. God does not punish or test me, so why should I?

So, as I am still learning and growing, I have now began telling myself whenever I need to "you are ok, you always do the best you know how", irrespective of the action or the outcome. I take full responsibility for my life, for my actions; The great ones and the idiotic ones, knowing full well that each and every step I take, has something that I need to be reminded of, something that I need to remember, something that God is whispering in my ear, something that, if I resist it, will only make my life harder and make that voice come a little loader. I am willing to grow into my full spiritual potential, and for now, that is all that is expected of me.

Lastly, I would like to share the prayer that we meditated on.  It is by St. Francis Assisi. Before I share this though, I would like to share that this Friday, 11.11.11 will be a special moment at 11.11 am in your local time. Millions of people will be meditating and praying on this day, and irrespective of whether you believe in the specialness of the date itself or not, we have all read the scientific findings about the power that resides in mass prayer/meditation. If you have a minute to spare around this time, please take the time to say the prayer, or chant OM for 10 minutes or anything else that you are available to do, then at 11.11, spend a minute in silence, and just feel the energy shifting.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.

Where there is hatred, let me sow love.

Where there is injury, pardon.

Where there is doubt, faith.

Where there is despair, hope.

Where there is darkness, light.

Where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;

to be understood, as to understand;

to be loved, as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive.

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

And just because it reads so beautifully, here is the original French version:

Seigneur, faites de moi un instrument de votre paix.

Là où il y a de la haine, que je mette l'amour.

Là où il y a l'offense, que je mette le pardon.

Là où il y a la discorde, que je mette l'union.

Là où il y a l'erreur, que je mette la vérité.

Là où il y a le doute, que je mette la foi.

Là où il y a le désespoir, que je mette l'espérance.

Là où il y a les ténèbres, que je mette votre lumière.

Là où il y a la tristesse, que je mette la joie.

Ô Maître, que je ne cherche pas tant à être consolé qu'à consoler,

à être compris qu'à comprendre,

à être aimé qu'à aimer,

car c'est en donnant qu'on reçoit,

c'est en s'oubliant qu'on trouve, c'est en pardonnant qu'on est pardonné,

c'est en mourant qu'on ressuscite à l'éternelle vie.

Namaste